Rudy Giuliani’s Rowdy 9/11 Speech Leaves Late-Night Hosts Reeling

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On “Late Night,” Seth Meyers said there was reason to agree with the commentators who suggested that Giuliani was not in full command of his faculties.

“I’m not saying Rudy was drunk, but that’s usually when guys from Brooklyn start to imitate the queen of England.” — SETH MEYERS

“I guess Rudy can add this tape to his reel of impressions if he ever auditions for ‘America’s Not Talent.’” — SETH MEYERS

Taco Bell Environmentalism

Taco Bell recently started a program that aims to help customers recycle the plastic from used sauce packets by having them mail those packets back.

Noah said the idea deserved points for creativity but probably wouldn’t actually do much to help the environment.

“This idea has all sorts of problems with it. For one thing, people who eat at Taco Bell don’t care about the environment. I mean, they don’t even care about their own bodies.” — TREVOR NOAH

“Yeah, this is a weird idea, but what did you expect? Coming up with weird ideas is Taco Bell’s whole thing. This is a place that will still wrap a soft shell around a hard shell and wrap that inside a Dorito’s chip — which is delicious, but you really think their idea to save the environment is going to make sense?” — TREVOR NOAH

The Punchiest Punchlines (M.T.A. Edition)

“At the Washington Football Team’s season opener, a pipe at the stadium burst over a group of fans, and some people said it might have been sewage. I don’t know; take a look. [Shows footage] Well, that’s a good omen for the season, you know? Washington is still looking for a team name; it’s too bad the Browns are already taken.” — JIMMY FALLON

“An investigation concluded last week that a recent M.T.A. subway outage that shut down 83 trains was caused by someone accidentally flipping a power switch. Said one man, ‘So thaaaat’s what it does.’” — SETH MEYERS

The Bits Worth Watching

Dr. Anthony Fauci talked to Noah about combating vaccine hesitancy and what he called the need for vaccine mandates.

Giuliani denies being drunk in rambling 9/11 speech where he did an impression of the Queen, saying he only had one whisky

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Rudy Giuliani denied being drunk in rambling 9/11 speech where he did an impression of the Queen.

Giuliani told the Daily Mail he only drank one whisky beforehand.

Giuliani previously denied being an alcoholic after Trump reportedly said he drank too much.

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Donald Trump’s former personal attorney Rudy Giuliani denied being drunk during a rambling speech marking the anniversary of 9/11.

Video of the address went viral, showing him doing an impression of Queen Elizabeth II, and prompting some commentators to speculate that he had been drinking.

He told DailyMail.com that he had a single measure of scotch whisky at the Cipriani restaurant in Manhattan before giving the speech on Friday, the day before the 20th anniversary of the terror attacks.

He said efforts to portray him as drunk are a political smear.

“Yes I had a scotch. But I was not drunk. There is a deliberate attempt [by] the left-wing to paint me that way,” he told the Mail.

He insisted that the last time he was drunk was in college and that now he drinks only “moderate amounts of scotch.”

There was widespread speculation on social media last week about whether he had been drunk during the speech after he adopted an English accent and recited an anecdote about the Queen making him an “honorary knight” after the attacks.

He also denied being associated with Prince Andrew and underage girls during the speech — a reference to the ongoing court case in which one of Jeffrey Epstein’s accusers is suing Andrew.

He also attacked President Biden’s withdrawal from Afghanistan after saying “I shouldn’t get into this.”

Giuliani told the Mail that his impression of the Queen was not meant to be mocking. That is “an interpretation that’s totally unfair. I use an English accent,” he said.

“And I have never mocked it. I just like to use an English – I imitate Churchill sometimes.”

Giuliani in August denied being an alcoholic after Trump White House staffers described him as one.

In an interview with NBC New York, he said he had “never” had a drinking problem.

“I don’t think I’ve ever done an interview drunk. I mean, I drink normally. I like scotch, I drink scotch,” he said.

“I’m not an alcoholic. I’m a functioning — I probably function more effectively than 90 percent of the population.”

The author Michael Wolff had reported in his book about the Trump White House that Donald Trump had said Giuliani drank too much.

Late night hosts gawk at the decidedly not-sober way Trump and Rudy Giuliani commemorated 9/11

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“Saturday of course was the 20th anniversary of 9/11,” Stephen Colbert said on Monday’s Late Show. “Presidents Clinton, Obama, and Biden appeared together at Ground Zero; George W. Bush spoke in Shanksville, Pennsylvania; and one former president did color commentary for a pay-per-view boxing match that did not last an entire round. Was that Jimmy Carter? It was not Carter. We’ll never know who it was.”

“We also heard from former New York Mayor Rudy Giuliani,” Colbert said. “In his speech, Giuliani focused on what’s important from that day: Making fun of how Queen Elizabeth reacted to his handling of the tragedy. … If you want to see more of Rudy’s Queen Elizabeth, you can catch him in the upcoming Netflix series The Clown.”

“Rudy’s rambling 9/11 speech led many to speculate that he was ‘drunk out of his mind,’” Colbert said. “Well, nice to know he’s cutting back. Of course, Rudy didn’t dignify these accusations with a response — he dignified them with many,” explaining why he’s not really an alcoholic, or maybe a “functional” one, or something.

“Look, I’m not saying Rudy was drunk, but that’s usually when guys from Brooklyn start trying to imitate the queen of England,” Seth Meyers said at Late Night. “I guess Rudy can add this tape to his reel of impressions if he ever auditions for America’s Not Talent.”

Again, “for the record, Rudy would like everyone to know he was definitely not drunk,” Meyers said, “and he let everyone know in a way that’s very uncharacteristic of drunk guys — he gave a series of long, rambling answers in which he repeated himself and made no sense.”

“Oh man, only Rudy can spend the 9/11 anniversary talking about the time he hung out with Jeffrey Epstein’s alleged pedophile friend,” Trevor Noah laughed at The Daily Show. “You know your speech went off the rails when people watching it are like, ‘I wish this guy would talk more about 9/11.’”

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And while all the other presidents were soberly memorializing the anniversary, “Donald Trump spent 9/11 doing live commentary for a boxing match,” Noah said. “And look, I’m not judging Trump. I’m happy anytime an unemployed person finds work, and I would definitely rather have him at a boxing match instead of hosting a memorial ceremony,” but “how is this his life?”

Tooning Out the News had more from Giuliani’s speech, which it turned into a Nobel-winning metaphor.